No One Is Coming To Save You From Yourself: Setting Boundaries for Self-Care
- Megan Devito
- Mar 17
- 3 min read
Introducing Abby. You're Going to LOVE Her!
Abby is the one everyone knows they can count on.
At work, she’s the one fixing last-minute crises, always smiling, and willing to go the extra mile, stay the extra hour, and run the extra errand.
At home, she’s managing schedules, meals, and making sure everyone else is okay.
Her friends tell her how amazing she is. They love her!
Her boss says they’d be lost without her, and they might be.
But Abby... she’s spent and barely keeping her head above water.
She says “yes” to everyone and every ask because she hates disappointing people.
Lately though, Abby's not feeling like her happy-go-lucky self.
Whether it's from not sleeping well, constantly stressing over everyone else's problems, or the new feeling of resentment toward the people she loves, Abby feels like she's drowning, and she can't help but wonder if anyone is coming to save her the way she's been saving them.
The Breaking Point: When Yes Feels Like Drowning
One night, Abby’s wide awake, staring at her phone.
11:00 p.m. Another email notification.
Another “quick favor.”
It's late, and she knows she should say no, but that voice in her head whispers again:
If you say no, they’ll be upset.
They’ll think you don’t care,that you’re selfish, not a team player.
You’ll lose your job.
Abby opens the email and begins to reply,"I can do that."
With her thumb hovering over the "send" button, she pauses, feeling the guilt and anger bubble up inside her.
She’ll miss her kid’s meet, and even though she knows her husband will find something to cook for dinner, she won’t be there.
But again…
She hits send and starts to cry out of frustration.
Abby knows something has to change.
Setting Boundaries for Self-Care
Exhausted again the next morning from tossing and turning all night, Abby knows she has to start saying no, but it feels so important to say yes.
Especially now that everyone expects her to be helpful, and to say yes.
As she makes her way through the day, Abby begins to see all the places in her life she's missing out on; places she wants to spend her time and energy, but can't if she keeps saying yes to everyone but herself and her family.
She realizes that she’s been sacrificing herself, her time, and her energy trying to make everyone else happy.
Abby finally realizes the only person who can save her from overwhelm and burnout is herself, but how does she stop now?
She knows she needs boundaries but has no idea where to start.
What Happens When You Start Setting Boundaries?
Once Abby took the Boundaries and Balance Audit, she knew exactly where she needed to start and decided the next best step for her was to hire a coach.
Once she started saying no to things that weren’t aligned with her values, something amazing happened:
Her stress levels dropped – Abby stopped second-guessing and overanalyzing every request.
She felt more confident – Saying no reminded her that her needs matter too.
She found free time – With fewer energy-sucking obligations, she could focus on what brought her joy.
Her relationships improved – She’s showing up 100% at work, at home, and with friends, not just as the “yes” person.
She feels like herself again – Abby has more joy, more purpose, and more time and energy for what is important to her.
Now It’s Your Turn: Are You Ready to Have More Confidence, Time, and Energy?
If Abby’s story sounds way too familiar, this is your time to say yes to an audit. You don’t have to keep people-pleasing, overthinking, or feeling anxious about saying no.
Setting boundaries is self-care.
And the more you set and keep boundaries, the more confident, calm, time, and energy you'll have.
You don’t have to figure this out alone.
If you’re ready to stop overcommitting, overthinking, and overworking, let’s talk.
P.S. You can learn more about Boundaries and Balance in episode 132 of More than Anxiety.
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