How to Build Mental Toughness : For Athletes and Leaders
- Megan Devito
- 1 day ago
- 3 min read
There's a phrase that used to get thrown around in sports, bars, and boardrooms when a person didn't know what to do with someone who was struggling mentally:
"They're just a head case."
Chris DeSantis heard it said about himself when he was just a kid. And instead of accepting it, he spent the next twenty-plus years proving that coach wrong, getting a master's in applied positive psychology from Penn, coaching D1 athletes at Georgia Tech and UPenn, and building a practice around one very important set of beliefs:
Optimism is a skill. Kindness is a skill. Mental toughness is a skill. None of it is fixed. All of it is trainable.
Chris joined me on the Peak Performance Mindset podcast this week, and I have to be honest, it was one of my favorite conversations yet!
Key Takeaways on How To Build Mental Toughness
We covered a lot of ground regarding performance mindset training, including:
Moving Past Fear: We talked about why fear-based motivation creates pessimism over time, and how to overcome fear of failure. (If you've ever told yourself I have to instead of I want to, this one's for you.)
Coaching Yourself: We discussed what it means to coach yourself, and how most of us are the worst coaches we could ever possibly imagine for ourselves, often relying on brutal negative self-talk when learning how to build mental toughness. (If you've worked with me, you know I'm going to ask you if you'd say that same nasty thing to your mom, grandma, daughter, or best friend.)
Shifting Your Perspective: We talked about what changes when you stop treating your mindset as a personality trait you're stuck with and start treating it like a technique you can actually change through a growth mindset.
If any part of you has ever thought "I'm just wired this way" or "I can't help how I react," you HAVE to listen to this episode!
Ready to Stop Muscling Through?
Here's what Chris and I know after years of doing this mindset work:
The person who is ready to change is not the one who has it all figured out. It's the one who is tired of muscling through. The one who knows something has to give but hasn't found the right place to start... YET!
If that's you, even a little bit, a Performance Audit is your next step toward performance optimization.
It's about 45 minutes. It's free. It's a real conversation, not a sales call. You'll leave knowing exactly where your mindset is keeping you stuck, and you'll have one concrete thing you can do about it.
No pressure. No pitch. Just clarity.
If this episode resonates with someone you know, someone who keeps saying they're fine, but you can see them beating themselves up—send it to them. The right words at the right moment change lives!
Cheering for you.
💜 Megan
P.S. Chris said something near the end of our conversation you don't want to miss. He reminded us that kindness is not a personality trait. It's something you grow intentionally. That includes kindness to yourself.
P.P.S. Be sure to follow Chris on Instagram and if you're a swimmer, swim parent, or swim fan like we are, check out his podcast, The Swim Brief.
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